becoming a little miserable.
Dec. 13th, 2024 09:39 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wmggwmaybe it's because it's finals season and i get irritated at the littlest thing but every small inconvenience annoys me! an old middle school acquaintance messaging me that they're glad we're friends (we have never talked besides the reels they send me), a new college friend tagging me in giveaways (literally why), having to walk in this cold and shitty weather, wanting to punch every single person that has made me feel like shit this semester. my blood isn't boiling but it feels like someone's waiting to crank up the heat under my ass. like i could explode at the littlest prick of blood.
throughout all of this, i have my own fair share of problems. i gotta come out to my dad tomorrow. i keep dreaming of lovers i've never had. imagining people i've never met opening their arms up to me and it breaks my heart to never really have that someone. seasonal depression is creeping up on me for sure. i'm studying for a final i didn't do jack shit for until yesterday. i want to isolate myself but the alarm clock keeps ringing every moment. i don't know how i made it this far without destroying my laptop because of how many corrections i've had to make because my brain capacity is slowly decreasing. i forget how to spell words. i think i'm getting worse, genuinely. reflecting on this semester has made me insane. i'm not a good person at all.
throughout all of this, i have my own fair share of problems. i gotta come out to my dad tomorrow. i keep dreaming of lovers i've never had. imagining people i've never met opening their arms up to me and it breaks my heart to never really have that someone. seasonal depression is creeping up on me for sure. i'm studying for a final i didn't do jack shit for until yesterday. i want to isolate myself but the alarm clock keeps ringing every moment. i don't know how i made it this far without destroying my laptop because of how many corrections i've had to make because my brain capacity is slowly decreasing. i forget how to spell words. i think i'm getting worse, genuinely. reflecting on this semester has made me insane. i'm not a good person at all.
